Monday, July 20, 2009

In For a Penny, In For a Pound

Oh brother...what have I gotten myself into?! Online dating. Yes, that's right. Full stop.

Let me backtrack here. After starting this blog, I had conveniently put aside the very book that got me writing it in the first place (A Year To Live by Stephen Levine). Hmmm...aren't we humans interesting creatures?

Well, I finally picked it up again and was fully energized and inspired with its profound message for all of about 35 minutes (I just don't have the stamina I use to). And what did I do during my burst of energy? I signed up with eHarmony. Yes, that's right. I plead temporary insanity.

My girlfriend has been encouraging me to log on for some time..."just check it out", she says. "I'm not interested in dating right now...it's just not the right time," has been my rebuttal of late. But then it occurs to me...in that 35 minute window...that life is short and I have absolutely nothing to lose by giving it a look-see. Not to mention it is indeed out of my comfort zone and that seems like reason enough in that particular moment.

The process of writing my profile has been the most fun by far. I actually learned a few things about myself in the process and figure that in itself was worth the "try now and get 3 months for the price of one" deal I got upon registering. I can't say I'm being a very active member on the site though. Passively responsive would be a more accurate description of my activity to date.

The least fun so far: being matched with people I already know, who I bump into regularly through my work, and who now know something about me that my closest friends and family do not (or at least didn't until reading this).

But, I have met one person, actually. We are in the process of setting up that critical first meet...coffee with an exit strategy + window for an extended visit should we get past the first few bits of awkward interview style conversation and my proclivity to foot-in-mouth syndrome. After our first phone conversation I was ready to hurl myself out the window, expecting to get an email from him stating he has come down with malaria or some such thing and will never be able to meet with me. So far, no message like that but it's still early.

On a positive note, his name is on the "good list" that my mother keeps. What started as a joke between mom and I about a year or so ago has turned into serious business in my family. She has a growing list of names on the now affectionately referred to "bad list" and, not so good for me, is constantly updating me with new additions. Bruce is the newest casualty. She's never met a Bruce she likes (which, by the way, is the only criteria for making the list) and the nurse by that very name, who was in charge of my dad for a time, did not make my chances with that one in the future any better.

This particular eHarmony match shares the same name as my brother so, you see, it could have gone either way. I was relieved to find out that both parents were very excited about the prospect of this potential match (and no, I did not tell them we met on eHarmony...nor did I tell my friends...sorry gang...no we weren't set up by mutual friends...yes, I know I'm a coward). The elation lasted a few strong minutes, until my mother asked what his last name was. It's a great last name, if I were to go about rating them, but her excitement crumbled when it became apparent he wasn't Norwegian. There's just no pleasing some people!

Ciao for now,

Sonja

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